How do you all feel about memory babies? Has anyone found they help with the grieving process? I know this is a tough topic to talk about, I’m currently trying to decide if picking reborning back up would be a good option as I walk out grief and healing of a recent loss. I think I will as it’s what I’m drawn to but just curious about others experiences
I think the good feeling you may get from helping others will make you feel good and that may help you in your own journey.
My initial reaction to memory babies was an unthinking ‘I think they’re kind of morbid.’ I’m currently ashamed of that judgement and no longer think that. Anything that helps ease a person’s grief is okay by me. I’ve made memorial babies and their mommies loved them. I lent one of my reborns to a friend who had lost her husband. She kept it for about 6 months and told me it really helped. Another person I know won one of my babies in a raffle. She said hers helped her get through her chemotherapy.
At this point I have a feeling I’ll mostly only be creating a small one for myself, though I may start offering sculpting services potentially. We shall see in the future, I have a feeling painting and rooting, which is something I haven’t done for awhile may be healing during this time of loss. At least that’s what I’m hoping.
I can understand the initial reaction, I never fully understood the want to hold something such as a reborn when grieving until now that I am grieving a big loss, I just adored the dolls and art form.
Reborning itself may also help by giving you something else to focus on.
In my opinion, whatever you want to do, if you think it’ll help you and you’re not harming anyone: do it!
I have my first baby, Silvia (the 6-month Easton Sculpt) and she is always out in the Living Room. I go through a lot of stress and sometimes I just pick her up and hold her and cuddle her. It DOES help. Sometimes I even sit with her in my chair for a while with her on my shoulder. These things do help. It is therapeutic, and as someone else said, if it helps a person, then do it.
Whatever helps you is what you should do. If it feels right, then go for it. I know a few people who have been helped by a memory doll. I also know some parents who would not appreciate such a thing. The fact that you’re asking at all makes me think you may benefit from the process at the very least.
I hope whatever you decide helps you in your healing. Baby loss is a very sensitive subject and I hope you have someone you can talk to and work through this grief in a positive way.
I’m really grateful for my support system right now, and you are right in that I will benefit from creating something and holding something. I’ve never had grief this deep or hard to understand and handle, the loss of a child/baby is indescribable.
I think as women, having all once been little girls, most of us have liked dolls and those dolls brought us comfort on some level as children. I see how they can continue to do that even when we are adults, for certain things. Our brain may remember how our favorite doll(s) gave us comfort when we were young when we had to go through things we didn’t quite understand. Everyone is different but many women can and do find comfort in a realistic doll when they are experiencing something very difficult in life.
I think they can be very calming. I feel like just holding a reborn in your arms can lower your blood pressure, help you relax. I know that I have customers who have autistic children and they have told me that holding one of their “babies” is the only way to calm them down sometimes. So I can see how they could actually help through the grieving process for some.
So sorry for your loss
I am making dolls to resemble my kids and using my hair to root lashes on them. I told my husband that when I’m gone to cremate me and put my ashes in them. He thinks I’m joking but I honestly think it would bring me comfort to have something to hold on to. In times of despair we all reach out for someone to hold on to and there may be times we want to grieve alone so a memory baby would be perfect
I’m working up the nerve to create one for myself as well. On one hand, I really want to do it but on the other, I’m afraid of pulling off the band-aid so to speak. Like you, I’m hoping painting (which I’ve been doing) and working on something tangible and that I can hold in my hands might ease how sad I feel sometimes. I’m a latecomer to this community, but if you see this, please update if you’ve started.
I’m not around much on the forum right now, but I definitely wanted to reach out and let you know, I do find reborning really healing. I’ve been reborning for ten years but my miscarriage spurred me on to reborning again after a two year hiatus, it’s really healing to work on the babies for me. And I’ve been so happy holding the babies lately, it really is worth trying if you think it might help.